Quotes Of The Day #93

If you like water,

You already like 72% of me!!! 😉

Faith

What does faith mean to you?

Do you have faith in something higher?

Do you believe that faith can bring good things into peoples lives?

To me, faith means believing in something other than yourself. I don’t believe that any two people can possibly hold the same view on faith whether their faith is religion based or not. I do believe in something higher, I was raised that way. My mother and I went to church every single Sunday and most Wednesday’s. I don’t go to church now, which I probably should but I’m still deciding how I feel about my religious faith as an adult without my mother’s influence.

When I think about faith my mind doesn’t automatically go to religion, it probably should but it just doesn’t. It goes to him, everything does. He is my every thought, I’m not entirely sure if that’s a good thing but that’s the way it is and I have faith that it will work out for us in the end. Yes, he is difficult and overprotective, sometimes even controlling… OK, he’s often controlling but I have faith in him that he means well with each frustrating action. My relationship with him test me in ways that I never thought imaginable but every second is worth it. I have faith that one day the deep fear of losing me will dissolve and he will embrace our future together, that’s all I want. I know he wants it too, though he would never say it. I have so much faith in that man that I will take every single tear, every single pointless argument, I’ll take it all just to be around for the day when he has faith in himself. I have faith that one day he will say what he feels openly and honestly, finally putting an end to his self-imposed exile.

I have faith that one day he will finally see that he isn’t a villain. He tries so hard to be one but deep down he’s really a hero. He’s been my hero, my tormentor at times, but mostly my hero. He saved me from myself, I spent my life pretending to be someone I wasn’t and he has shown me that it’s OK to be myself. I don’t have to conform to the person my mother wanted me to be and I thank him dearly for it. I have faith that he will see how truly incredible he is, he’s so incredibly perfectly imperfect and I love him so much for that. He may not show it the conventional way but he tries and that’s all I can ask for from him. I have faith that if he continues to try, he will finally allow himself to be happy. I will continue to have faith in him until he stops trying.

Quotes Of The Day #92

They told me that to make her fall in love, I had to make her laugh.

But every time she laughs, I’m the one who falls in love..

Pain

Does pain turn people away from their God? If so, how?

Pain can turn anyone away from just about anything. Pain is capable of causing you to do things you would never consider doing, such as blaming God for your pain.

Pain.. such a simple word that holds so much inside. I have come to learn that pain is the strongest emotion one can feel. Unlike every other emotion there is no upside to pain, no positive notion that can make you look at the pain from a different perspective, there’s only pain.

Lately, I have become very well acquainted with pain the ache has nearly become unbearable. Sometimes when I’m alone, which is more often than not as of recently, I find myself trying to decide which type of pain is worse.

The answer isn’t as simple as I thought it would be. The slow and steady aching pain, the type of pain that comes when you’ve been hurt repeatedly by the same person yet here you are, here I am, allowing the pain to continue, it never ends. Only in those rare moments when he pulls me to his chest and makes promises that he never seems able to keep does the pain disappeared. Just as I get used to the freedom, my freedom my self inflicted pain, it returns with another blow.

I have decided that the hot, burning, inescapable pain is the worst. This pain comes when you finally begin to relax, you finally breathe, thinking that the pain is yesterday’s problem when in fact it’s today’s problem, tomorrow’s, and every day after that. These pain comes when you pour everything into something, into someone, and they betray you so suddenly that the pain crushes you and you feel as if you are barely breathing, barely holding on to that small fraction of whatever is left inside you begging you to go on, not to give up.

Sometimes it’s faith that people hold onto, sometimes, if you’re lucky enough you can confide in someone else and trust them to pull you out of the pain before you drown in it for too long.

Pain is one of those hideous places that once visited you have to fight your way out and even when you think you have escaped you are permanently branded.

If you’re like me, you don’t have anyone to depend on, no one to take your hand and assure you that you will make it through this hell. Instead, you have to lace up your boots, grab your own hand, and pull yourself out.